9 weeks

Visiting with Grampa at Christmas

Sawyer loves his Meemaw (Gramma)

Having fun with Aunt Molly

And so, my sweet Sawyer is 9 weeks old today. I can't believe how much he's grown, and I still can't believe I'm actually a mama. He had his 2 month appointment today, complete with shots and everything. He was 11 pounds 14 ounces, 23 inches. According to my doctor, he is in the 50 percentile, average, right in the middle. But he is far from average.

Of course he was administered his first shots today. I made Ryley come with to the appointment because I wasn't sure how I would do. I'm so glad he came...it was the first time Sawyer has actually cried. It was heartbreaking for me, as I'm sure any mother understands. Having never heard a true sad or hurt cry out of him, it was especially traumatic. To see real tears falling from his eyes. But Ryley was great, held Sawyer's hands and told him what a good boy he was.

He is sleeping through the night now. According to The Baby Book by Dr. William Sears, sleeping through the night by medical standards is 5 hours. I put Sawyer down for bed and he sleeps 8 hours, wakes up hungry and falls asleep by the end of his feeding, then sleeps another 2-3 hours. It's been that way for the last few weeks, and he's always been a good sleeper before that as well. I know, this can change depending on his development. But I am really enjoying it right now.

I find myself praying for him constantly throughout the day. I pray for his character, I pray that he will love the Lord with his whole heart. I pray that he will not suffer in this life unless it brings glory to God. I pray for his wife, that she will love him second only to God...and selfishly, that she will love me, too, so that I will still get to see my boy. Yes, I know, I'm getting ahead of myself a bit. But the Lord knows the worries of my heart and I'm thankful I can go to Him with my thoughts.

6 weeks old

Lounging around with Papa and watching some football.

Starting to resemble me a little bit! At first I think he looked so much like Ryley, but now it depends who's holding him...what do you think?

Napping after church.

Trying out yet another infant seat...Macy is always closeby, watching her boy.

Thank God for Little Boys

I have always thought it would be best for me to be a mother of boys. In analyzing my feelings, personality, and life perspectives, I have so many reasons why. Maybe it's because I was awful to my mother and so I am afraid of having a daughter...because what goes around, comes around, right? And while I do love looking pretty, expensive shampoos, and nice cosmetics, those who know me best would agree I am a tomboy by nature. I always dreamed of having sons and going to their football games. And fine, I'll admit it...the idea of having all sons seems like the perfect setting so I can be "queen of the castle."

So when God did a number on our plans for starting a family, I was sure I was done for. We were not able to choose the gender of the child we thought we'd adopt since we would be first-time parents, and almost all perspective adoptive families end up with a boy. Which was great for me. But the Lord planned for me to be pregnant, and I was sure (and terrified) that it would be a girl since He often changes everything with His plans.

In the weeks before I know the gender of our baby, I resolved that God's plans are always particularly amazing and perfect. So I had a peace about the baby girl I thought I would have.

Praise God for Sawyer. A perfect baby boy, just like I've always dreamed of. Sawyer is such a wonder, more beautiful than I ever thought a child could be. I know, I'm his mama so I'm inclined to think he's beautiful.

But look at him in his winter hat. Proof of why I'm so in love with this boy.

So in love that I dread the thought of being away from him for two hours to get a haircut.

And during this Christmas season, as I'm realizing what parenthood does to one's perspective, how it has changed my heart.....I am in awe of the miracle of my Savior's birth.

My Sweet Little Boy

Sawyer is 5 1/2 weeks old already, and time is absolutely flying by. These pictures were taken when he was 2 weeks old by an amazing friend of mine. He is such a sweet baby. He sleeps well at night and is very happy during the day, not fussy at all. Sometimes he gets into moods where he just squirms around a lot and squawks, but he's not into crying. Having a baby is a lot of work, but I didn't think a baby could be this mild mannered!

He has been smiling for a few weeks now, every day a little more. I can't even put into words how I feel about him and about life. I am just so in love and content being home with him.

The only thing I've been disappointed with is the fact that Ryley is still in the field and isn't home much. He sees him about twice a week (Sawyer and I are usually sleeping when he comes home and when he leaves again). Sundays are the only family day we get to have. It just makes me sad that I'm the only one who is witnessing every detail of the changes in Sawyer.

I already want him to stay little forever! He is such a blessing, and this time in my life is more amazing than I could have imagined.